Part 4

There’s a moment.

You know the one.

Everything inside you is too loud, and you need to tell someone.

You reach for the phone. You text your best friend. You text your sibling. Whoever will listen. You need to vent. You need validation. You need someone to remind you that you are not crazy.

Because when you stay in your head too long, the voices start sounding like facts.

I get it. I have been there thumb over send.” Ready to unload everything I have been holding. And sometimes that’s the right move. Sometimes, connection is the medicine.

But here is what I have learned. Before you hand it to someone else.

Sit with yourself.

Not forever.

Not in isolation.

Not as punishment disguised as strength.

Just long enough to hear yourself again.

This is the quiet instead of outsouring it.

For me, it looks like this:

No phone. No TV. No background noise.

Just me … crosslegged on the floor. Breathing.

In for four. Hold for seven. Out for eight.

Sometimes it’s easy. Sometimes the noise is so loud I can barely hear my own breath.

But the longer I sit, the quieter it gets. I practice gratitude even when I don’t believe it yet.

“All is well, right now in this moment, all is well”

Sometimes I cry.

Because I have been holding so much, and this is the first time I have let myself feel it.

That’s part of it.

The quiet part isnt’ about shutting everything down.

It’s about holding yourself.

Two days before, I walked out of Blueville. It had been a hard day. work, family, smiling while falling apart inside. You know that feeling.

So, I sat in my closet

Thirty minutes of tears. Back and forth thoughts of wanting to grab my phone and let someone else carry this weight.

But I stayed. I breathed. I reminded myself . I am the only person in my body. No one else can sit here for me. No one else can do this part. Someone else can offer perspective, reassurance, and love.

But I have to trust myself enough to sit with myself.

Slowly, the noise settled. Not because everything was fixed. But because I was present. Holding myself. And that changed everything .

Here is why the quiet matters;

If you always outsource,

You can never learn that you can hold yourself.

You never build self-trust.

And self-trust is the foundation of steady.

It’s knowing that when things get hard, you won’t abandon yourself.

You won’t numb. You won’t run. You won’t hand it over immediately.

You will sit with it .

You are the only person in your body.

No one else can regulate your nervous system for you . No one can tell you what’s true in a way that actually matters.

That part is yours.

And the only way to build is to practice. To sit. To breathe. To cry if you need to. To say something kind to yourself, even if it feels foreign.

The quiet is where you meet the real you. Not the performing version. Not the strong for everyone version. The tired one, the scared one, the trying my best one.

And when you sit without judgment.

Something shifts.

So, before you reach for your phone, try this.

Just for a few minutes:

No noise.

No distractions.

Breathe in for four

Hold for seven

Out for eight.

See what is left when you stop outsourcing and just stay.

You might find you had all the tools all along.

You might find the person you are looking to save you … is you!

🌻Serenity